I’m not a bitter person. Sure some crappy things have happened to me in my life, but really in comparison to others my life is a doddle. I really have no real reason to complain.

But that’s what English people are great at. Complaining, moaning, bitching and whining. So why break the mold?

My first and only real relationship lasted three years before university and jealousy wrecked all that we’d both worked so hard to create. I don’t regret it at all, just wish I’d made some different decisions.

That’s the beauty of hindsight though right? It allows you to look back with wisdom and a sense of clarity that you never had at the time.

So a year and a half on, she’s in a relationship with a guy the total opposite of me and happily in love. Good for her. Genuinely.

So where am I at?

Well, I’m living in a beautiful house which I’m renting with my best mate. Things couldn’t be more perfect - well… :/

It’s like he’s Johnny Depp and I’m Johnny Vegas. Don’t get me wrong I’m not hugely overweight, but the metaphor is still valid.

He’s got four girls at his beck and call, would’ve been more but he needed to ‘bin some off’ because it was too much hassle.

Me? Oh, I don’t think the girls in the town even know I’m here.

I often get out into town and have a small panic attack, look down and expect to find myself wearing a camouflage tee and jeans. I’m that invisible to girls.

Am I bitter? No. Am I jealous? Hell yeah. Am I gunna cry about it? No.

The funny thing is that ever since I was small I’ve had this belief that no matter how shit things may seem, if you keep plugging along and doing the right and honourable thing you’ll be rewarded in the long run.

So as I lay here whilst my housemate is in the next room, fucking the girl I like so much, I’m not angry or emotional.

I’m just hoping that I’ll see the carrot on the end of this proverbial stick sooner rather than later…